Five rude emails you send to people without realizing it

Five rude emails you send to people without realizing itFive rude emails you send to people without realizing itEven the most likeable and well-mannered among us can still look like jerks in an email. Writing an email that comes across just like you do in person is a fine art.During a conversation, you adjust your tone, facial expression, gestures and posture in order to fit the mood of what youre conveying. You do this because people tend to be much mora responsive tohowyou say things than towhatyou actually say.Email strips a conversation bare. Its efficient, but it turns otherwise easy interactions into messy misinterpretations. Without facial expressions and body posture to guide your message, people look at each word you type as an indicator of tone and mood.Follow Ladders on FlipboardFollow Ladders magazines on Flipboard covering Happiness, Productivity, Job Satisfaction, Neuroscience, and morefruchtwein of the mistakes people make in their emails are completely avoidable. The following list digs into these subtle mistakes and hidden blunders.The compulsive CC And Reply AllCCing people all the time is one of the most annoying things you can do via email. Id say its the most annoying, but this honor is bestowed upon the excessive reply all. If someone sends an email to you and a bunch of other people, do you really think every recipient needs to get another email from you saying thanks? They dont, and when you do this, it sends people climbing up a wall.The trick for knowing when to CC someone is to treat your email as if its an in-person meeting. The question then becomes this Would it be necessary or helpful to have this person come to the meeting? If the answer is no, then dont waste his or her time with an email. As for reply all, just dont do it. Even if someone else in the thread replies all, youre still annoying everyone to death when you join the fray. If you have something to say, its better to send this directly (and privately) to the original se nder and let him or her decide if the group should know about it too.The way-too-briefAll too often, the cause of email conflict is an imbalance between the effort in the initial email and the effort in the response to that email. When someone types up a detailed paragraph outlining important issues, they expect you to respond carefully. Sending back Got it or Noted just doesnt do the trick. Without knowledge of your intent and tone, brief responses come across as apathetic and even sarcastic to the receiver. This is unfortunate because this is rarely the senders intent.The best way to avoid being misinterpreted in a brief response is to share your intent. Even responding with Im a little busy but should be able to read it later this week comes across much better than Got it, which a lot of people will interpret as indifference.The URGENT subject lineSubject lines that say URGENT or ASAP show complete disregard for the recipient. If your email is that urgent, pick up the phone and g ive the person a call. Even in the rare instance when an email actually is urgent, labeling it as such in the subject line is unnecessary and sets a strong, negative tone.The key to avoiding URGENT subject lines is twofold. First, if the issue is best dealt with in any form other than email, then thats how you should be dealing with it. Second, if this is not the case, then the issue lies in your ability to create a strong subject line. After all, people check their email frequently, so as long as your subject line catches their eye, it will get the job done. Instead of labeling the email as urgent, ask yourself why the email is urgent. The answer to this question is your new subject line. If a client needs an answer today, then simply make your subject line Client Needs Response Today. This maintains the sense of urgency without setting a rude, desperate tone.The Debbie DownerSending emails that consistently tell people what they do wrong and what they shouldnt be doing really take s a toll. Even if you are trying to offer constructive criticism, you need to avoid negativity in your emails at all costs. Since people are unable to hear your tone directly, they read into the connotations of words and create a tone in their head as they go along. Negatives become especially negative in email form.Whenever you find yourself using negative words like dont, cant, wont or couldnt, turn them into positives. Making this change transforms the entire tone of the message. For example, instead of saying, You cant complete reports like this in the future, say, Next time you complete a report, please When you must deliver negative feedback, dont do it in an email. Just hop on the telephone or walk down the hall.The robotIts easy to think of email as a way to get something done quickly, but when you do this to the extreme, you come across as inhuman. You wouldnt walk into someones office and hand them a report to do without acknowledging them somehow. Jumping straight into th e nitty-gritty might seem like the most effective thing to do, but it leaves a lasting negative impression.Fixing this one is simple. Just take an extra second to greet the person youre writing to. You dont have to ask your recipient about his or her weekend. Just a simple acknowledgment of the individual as a human being is all it takes. This keeps the tone much more respectful than it would be if you were to simply send assignments.Bringing it all togetherThe trickiest thing about emailing is making certain that people perceive your message the way you intend them to. You must be socially aware to pull this off. That is, be willing to take the time to consider how things look from your recipients perspective before you hit send.Travis Bradberryis the co-author ofEmotional Intelligence 2.0and the cofounder ofTalentSmart.This article first appeared at LinkedIn.You might also enjoyNew neuroscience reveals 4 rituals that will make you happyStrangers know your social class in the first seven words you say, study finds10 lessons from Benjamin Franklins daily schedule that will double your productivityThe worst mistakes you can make in an interview, according to 12 CEOs10 habits of mentally strong people